I am having a horrible day. I am trying to recover and keep myself alive. Alive as in not overdosing or killing myself. It’s a daily struggle for me to even find something to smile about.
What about those that “LOVE YOU SO MUCH” but can’t take their egos out of the equation. I in recovery but I have hurt someone, someone who won’t let it fucking go. I feel like a huge piece of shit anyway, but must you make me feel worse? Can’t you own your own feelings and not puke all over me?
This recovery is MY recovery and it’s becoming increasingly hard to feel like a burden. I am a burden. There I SAID IT.
I don’t want to be a burden on anyone so I have decided to take off for a few days. Go somewhere completely quiet and get my thoughts together. Take some time for ME – no one else but ME. Yes I am apologetic and yes I have come to you and apologized for everything – do you have to keep beating me down with it? Take your ego and put it in check, this is not about you.
This is one of those days where I feel like I am running to stand still. It really sucks and I just can’t sit around and cry anymore.